Heavy Is the Crown- Chapter 3
Luther had thought Bowser a strange choice for a name until a Lakitu brought their early-hatched child home to them. Seeing his size, the spike and horn stubs, and the long, thick tail, he came around quickly. Bowser had been the name of the last great dragon seen in the Empire's history, an enormous green wyrm of legendary power and wrath.
So it seemed a natural fit to both parents. Cassandra held Bowser close as she walked along beside Luther the day after the Lakitu brought their baby home, heading to the magistrate's office in order to have him officially documented. The block-like gray building, an imposing stone façade leaving no questions of who was in charge in the village, stood before them now.
"This will be interesting," she commented.
"Let's hope not," Luther replied. "I want us to just be in-and-out, no hassles, no worries." Together they ascended the steps and headed inside, entering on a long, dimly lit front lobby with various rows of hastily built wooden chairs lined up along the walls. Seated at the check-in counter was one of the Empire's few humanoid residents, likely an immigrant from Hyrule far to the north. He peered at them tiredly over thin-rimmed glasses, adjusting his tie.
"Can I help you," he droned.
"Yes, our child hatched early," Cassandra said, shifting Bowser so his head rested on her shoulder. "We've come to have him recorded." The clerk looked at little Bowser, then rifled through some forms, grabbing one out with a pen and handing both to Luther.
"Down that hallway, on the left side about halfway down," the clerk said, returning to the task of looking tired and bored. Cassandra and Luther headed down the hall he'd pointed to, and when they reached the Records Office, they found themselves entering another gloomy, utilitarian waiting room, though this one was empty except for a counter upon which stood a service bell. They found a quiet corner and sat down so that Luther could fill out the portion of the form intended for parents.
Cassandra sat on the floor and let little Bowser down, smiling warmly at him and trying to baby-talk the boy. Bowser just cocked his head to one side, seemingly intent on just listening. When she paused, he began toddling about, hands out at his sides for balance, tail swishing back and forth heavily.
"Cass, this question wants to know if he hatched crawling, waddling or walking. What should I put down," Luther asked. Cassandra watched as Bowser peered at a basket full of koopa infant toys a few yards away, his face breaking into a wide smile. He began charging the basket, stumbled, then got back up and waddled over to it, grabbing the side and looking into the collection eagerly.
"Waddling. He isn't exactly lithe, husband. I think his tail is part of the problem," she said. Bowser reached down into the basket and pulled out a plastic block with a ball inside of it, which rattled as he shook it violently up and down.
"How much has he cried," Luther asked. Cass felt her proud smile begin to sour a little. She turned confused eyes up at her mate.
"You know what? He hasn't. Not once since that lakitu brought him to us." Luther raised an eyebrow at her.
"Wasn't that what woke me up last night," he asked.
"No, that was me," Cass said. "I woke up suddenly, worried about him, and when I crossed the room to his crib and saw him just sleeping in there, I wept with relief." She shook her head. "He hasn't cried at all. He's hardly made any noise of any kind." The block Bowser was playing with rattled and jounced as he threw it across the carpeted floor, chasing after it as soon as it came to a stop. "Unless you count that," she added, hooking a thumb over her shoulder.
Luther jotted down something to answer the question, then moved on. Cass wasn't sure why, but she didn't want to know what he'd written down. He went through the rest of the form fairly quickly, then took it up to the counter and rang the bell. When he did, Cass saw Bowser twitch, ducking down and spinning toward the noise, stubby claws raised up defensively.
A red tribe koopa wearing spectacles and a plain white button shirt showed up from farther back in the cubicle area hidden from clients' view, looking confused. "Um, can I help you," he asked.
"Our son hatched early," said Luther. "We're here to have him recorded." Cass scooped Bowser up and brought him over to the counter, the clerk looking less than amused.
"You're kidding, right? Sir, how old is he, really? Did you just forget to have him recorded? Because that happens." Luther had suspected they might run into this problem. He lowered his own rucksack, which he almost always had with him, and withdrew from it Bowser's egg, which the lakitu had also brought to their home as proof that Bowser was their hatchling. This he set on the counter, eliciting a short, sharp intake of breath through the clerk's teeth. "Oh. Oh my word. Um, thank you," he said, reaching under the counter for a measuring tape.
The clerk procured a clipboard and a pen for himself, as well as the form from Luther. He measured the shell, jotted a number down, then picked up the shell. "Wait here two, maybe three minutes, I'll have Dr. Tish come get you." Luther and Cass took Bowser back over to the toy basket, where he proceeded to grab out a hard plastic ring, jamming it between his teeth, gnawing on it while making noises like a dog growling.
"Mr. And Mrs. Entem," asked a cultured, smooth voice behind them. The couple looked over to find a stout mouser in a white lab coat and gray scrubs, his stethoscope hung round his neck, large ears twitching.
"Yes, that's us," said Luther, offering the doctor his hand. Tish shook with him, then Cass. He then turned his attention down upon Bowser, who was still holding the ring and gnawing away contentedly. "This is our son, Bowser. He's a singlet."
"A singlet," said Dr. Tish, reaching down for Bowser. "Very rare, these last fifty years or so, very rare indeed. Do you want to come with me, fellow?" Bowser just went still, mouth still clamped on the plastic ring.
"Um, can I check his diaper first," Cass asked timidly. "Just in case."
"Surely. Follow me," said Tish, guiding them through a small office area and into a section of the floor reserved for his part of the magistrate's duties and obligations. He pointed out a restroom for Cass, who ducked inside and locked the door. She opened the changing table set in the wall, taking heart that Bowser had only peed a bit. That morning he'd woken her up by the awful smell of something far worse, but she'd deftly changed him then as now.
Cassandra brought Bowser into Tish's exam room, setting him up on a sheet-covered table. Bowser had released the plastic ring from his mouth, quietly sitting and staring up at his mother. Tish sat down at a desk, flipping the fat red switch on a tall beige tower computer. The unit clicked, clacked and whined as it began booting up, catching Bowser's attention. The boxy green monitor flickered to life, and soon it went black with green text. Tish used his keyboard arrows to navigate to the new patient form.
"All right, first thing's first. What's your son's name?"
"Bowser," Cass said proudly.
"Ah, like the dragon," said the mouser doctor, typing away. "Okay. He's male, check. Okay, Mrs. Entem, please place your son on the scale there and take the toy from him." Cass lifted Bowser up under the arms and toted him to the scale, and halfway there the toy became a non-issue as the oversized dropped it of his own accord. Cass and Luther both did a double take at the scale reading. "Thirty-four pounds, all right," Tish said, punching in the numbers on the keyboard. "Please lay him down flat and hold his leg out."
The doctor measured Bowser's length, then began a brief visual inspection, taking note of the horn nubs, the crimson hair, his brute frame and thick tail. He also noted the spike studs on Bowser's shell, which, like all koopas, could naturally unhook from itself to be removed or covered with clothing. When he was finished, he saved the file and stood up.
"Okay, if you'll follow me, we need to take initial blood an saliva samples, then give him an x-ray," said Tish. In another lab room he took his samples and x-ray, though Luther tried to protest that this new technology struck him as potentially dangerous. Tish assured him it was not, and had them wait out in the lobby while he ran a few tests.
Bowser snacked on some greens Cass had brought with them, and was about finished when Tish came out with a grave look on his face. Cass felt her stomach twist as he stood over them and their son. "What is it," she asked. "What's wrong?"
"Ma'am, I've discovered something highly unusual about your son's physiology. A couple of somethings, in fact. Firstly, as an early hatchling, there's always a risk of him eating something he shouldn't. He appears to have swallowed a fire flower seed." Cass gasped, her husband scoffing behind her.
"Impossible," Luther said. "He would have been blown apart."
"That's just it," Dr. Tish said. "He should be dead. His body seems to have not only tolerated it, but is incorporating the plantlife into his body. I have no idea what this means for him, though I'd love to find out."
"What, like, study him," Luther asked warily.
"Periodically, yes. That would be briliant, if you'll keep bringing him back to me for comparative study. Not here, though. Better at my private practice. I'll get the address for you." He took out his script pad and jotted down the info, handing the paper to Cass. "Now, the other anomaly was in his blood, and I'm not entirely certain what it means yet, as I've never seen anything like it. Rest assured, I'll let you know if I discover anything. Do you have a telephone in your home?"
"We don't," said Luther. "We don't have any need, really."
"Well, you may want to invest in one," said Dr. Tish. "There are subsidies you can apply for. I'll have Patrick fetch you a form, you can get it from him on the way out." Tish reached out and patted Bowser gently atop the head. "There's a good lad. Bring him round my office in a couple of months."
And so Luther and Cassandra Entem left the registrar's office, neither one aware of the details Tish would be putting in his report to the local magistrate and the Central Census Ministry. Not even a week old, and Bowser was already drawing attention. It wouldn't all be good.